Holy shit/Bike Shop lulz

12602 posts / 0 new
Last post
Chris_Kulczycki69

I dont get your portland slang.

Tue, 12/14/2010 - 23:08
beargrinderrrrrr
beargrinderrrrrr's picture

what bike shop is this? i can't remember where the murder mart is, but i definitely remember hearing that term to refer to one specific corner store. it's the one on 10th and alberta iirc, but the rest of your story doesn't match up with that on.

Tue, 12/14/2010 - 23:14
yung jeezy
yung jeezy's picture

naw the kc mart on killingsworth and vancouver.
cascade cycling.

Tue, 12/14/2010 - 23:26
yung jeezy
yung jeezy's picture

Chris_Kulczycki69 wrote:
I dont get your portland slang.

corner bodega?

Tue, 12/14/2010 - 23:26
EivlEvo
EivlEvo's picture

Turps internet expressions are the fucking greatest itt.

sol... no. bike shop dewds were not right and thats hella expensive for all that shit.

Tue, 12/14/2010 - 23:42
beargrinderrrrrr
beargrinderrrrrr's picture

yung jeezy wrote:
naw the kc mart on killingsworth and vancouver.
cascade cycling.

oh, THAT place? ha ha, is the owner still a crazy old dude? i remember stopping in there and all the bikes were, like...recumbents and shit like that, or...i don't think it was belt drive, i think it was the rod style, like on cars and such, and he was telling me it was the "wave of the future". i sorted of nodded until he finally shut up for a second and said "cool, see ya", and left.

that shop?

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 00:02
bigmatt

I have until just recently worked in a bike shop for the last 2.5+ years, but for the life of me can't remember any really good stories.

The only thing I think of is the idiots that I had to often deal with. So many that some of them didn't even have the brain power to use the pump we had at the front of the store.

Or the guy coming in every other week with a flat tire claiming we didn't fix it correctly, and even time it was a pinch flat. What do you mean I can't drop curbs on my road bike?

And, more than a few bikes that I don't know how they were still able to propel the rider forward. The worst I can remember was a POS department store MTN bike with a broken rear axle, blown out bottom bracket (metal shards were the bearings use to be), hole in the side wall of the rear tire (still holding air), and completely rusted chain, brake and shift cables.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 00:25
curiousincident
curiousincident's picture

bigmatt wrote:
What do you mean I can't drop curbs on my road bike?

the real kicker is that the answer aught to be 'well, of course you can drop curbs on your road bike.'

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 01:01
beargrinderrrrrr
beargrinderrrrrr's picture

yeah, i was gonna say...

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 01:44
deadforkinglast
deadforkinglast's picture

beargrinderrrrrr wrote:
deadforkinglast wrote:
Sports Basement.

which one?

Presidio.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 03:31
rhys
rhys's picture

I have nothing of the calibre of idiots you guys mention. When I was 14/15 I would ride on saturday mornings on my MTB then go to a shop maybe 20 minutes drive to work out the back all day, building bikes up. The shop owner was a dick and wouldn't give us money, only goods to the value of $40. So every saturday when I finished, I would go to each of the other employees and they would give me $40 worth of shit, totaling $120.

Once the shop owner went away for a month, and we went to the butcher over the road and got a liver. We put it in the roof, and after about a week it started to smell - really badly. It was hilarious watching him try to find what and where the smell was. I sometimes wonder if it's still in there.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 05:24
Elderbear
Elderbear's picture

bigmatt wrote:
The only thing I think of is the idiots that I had to often deal with. So many that some of them didn't even have the brain power to use the pump we had at the front of the store.

Oh, God, the pump...

Commuter dude has come into our shop on the weekly for the last year or so to top off his tires and either COMPLETELY DEFLATES THEM, or forgets to unscrew the presta head and just lays into the pump with all he's got to no avail. I've personally explained the mechanics of the presta valve to him three or four times, and once he started ranting about how stupid he was in a really serious, almost scary manner. Was ridiculous.

johnnyraja wrote:
This is the most pointless conversation ever had on a forum entirely devoted to pointless conversation.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 09:18
curiousincident
curiousincident's picture

woah. honestly sounds like he might've been on to something there. i mean, i accidently let out 5-10 psi regularly enough but total deflation? that takes several seconds of doing it completely wrong.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 09:36
Rusty Piton
Rusty Piton's picture

I was hanging out in the basement of the shop one day and this real bro dude comes in with a Giant cross bike with a carbon fork. There's already a rack on the back, but he wants one for the front, saying he's going on a bike tour. Mark, the owner of the shop, tells the guy that he doesn't have any front racks that will fit the fork and that he should probably just get a steel fork anyways if he wants to run a front rack. Mark even offered the guy some discount on a crosscheck fork, but the guy insisted on putting the burliest Jandd rack the shop sells on his bike. Of course, the fork isn't equipped for a rack and doesn't even have fender eyelets. Mark suggests that he could use P-clamps if he really wanted, but it would be best to just use an appropriate fork. The guy seems not to like the idea of P-clamps and says "Nah, I'll just drill the fork so I can use bolts".

Everyone just looks at him in disbelief for a few seconds and eventually Mark tells him that that's a really really bad idea. Then the guy gets all indignant and says, "Dude, I install cell phone towers for a living! I KNOW how to put shit together!" Then he buys the rack and storms out of the store probably to go tell his buddies how stupid the old guy at the bike shop was and how he tried to rip him off.

emor wrote:
Bicycle commuting is the worst way to get anywhere except for all the other ways.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 09:52
anomaly

A shop I used to work at sold/rented wet suits to tri geeks. The owner would always go into his office when a hot girl was changing into a suit, the office happened to be located next to the fitting room. He was gone for a week and I needed something from a cabinet in his office so I went in, hopped on a stool (he is 6'10") and looked on the top shelf to find what I needed. I then saw that he had setup mirrors in an air vent in the wall so he could watch the women change.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 11:16
Rusty Piton
Rusty Piton's picture

^holy shit!

emor wrote:
Bicycle commuting is the worst way to get anywhere except for all the other ways.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 11:20
RJ
RJ's picture

yung jeezy wrote:
jeez...
i have so many stories from working in the cracked out spot in town.
i'll type some up later.

This.

If I had a nickel for every time I was drunkenly cursed at about not having motor scooter chains I'd have a fuck load of nickels.

truckdoug wrote:
go fuck yourself, fun hating motherfucker

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 11:54
anomaly

2 days after I realized that he got back from his trip he accused the head mechanic and I of stealing a really expensive stem from the QBP order. He left the 2 of us to run the shop for 10 days, we worked all day every day during that period and didn't even begin to check in the shipment as it was so busy. Apparently if you don't report a missing shipment item to QBP within 2 days of receipt they won't send you another. We quit on the spot, bikes in the stands, etc. Fuck that dude.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 11:56
radicole
radicole's picture

There's this intense dude that used to come in all the time with his ss mongoose mtb slick thing. He had custom fabbed a sick trailer with used tubes and an effing HANDTRUCK. he was wrapping the tubes around his saddle, which made it look like some grotesque kinda penis thing. He had a buncha boxes and stuff on it, and had installed a siq suspension fork from some POS bike he found on the railroad tracks.

Telling us all this WHILE wearing a full-face helmet, wife beater, juggalo shorts and sandals. The true nature of his visit was to inquire about parts for his newly acquired pedicab, which he wanted us to all take a ride in, complete with stickers from a sponsorship by our shop.

He frequently gets aggro when things don't go his way, and smells awful.

Every time he comes in now, we all hide.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 12:53
dougtruck
dougtruck's picture

omg i would rage on people so hard. straight up 187 on mofucka

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 13:06
yung jeezy
yung jeezy's picture

beargrinderrrrrr wrote:
yung jeezy wrote:
naw the kc mart on killingsworth and vancouver.
cascade cycling.

oh, THAT place? ha ha, is the owner still a crazy old dude? i remember stopping in there and all the bikes were, like...recumbents and shit like that, or...i don't think it was belt drive, i think it was the rod style, like on cars and such, and he was telling me it was the "wave of the future". i sorted of nodded until he finally shut up for a second and said "cool, see ya", and left.

that shop?

yes. the dude that owns the shop knows nothing about anything but conspiracy theories and drinking the day away. he bought so many of thos shaft drive bikes and they never worked. we had to throw them away. straight up in the dumpster.
the owner cam in one day and his handlebars were all fucked up so we asked him what had happened. this is at around 11AM and he reeks of booze. he said that he had ridden down his driveway and that someone had swerved at him so he fell. well he was drunk as a skunk and we knew he was bullshitting. when we were fixing his bike we found that his two water bottles were full to the top with wine. he left the shop and went directly to the bar across the street to drink for the rest of the day.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 14:12
wickedwagon
wickedwagon's picture

Elderbear wrote:
bigmatt wrote:
The only thing I think of is the idiots that I had to often deal with. So many that some of them didn't even have the brain power to use the pump we had at the front of the store.

Oh, God, the pump...

Commuter dude has come into our shop on the weekly for the last year or so to top off his tires and either COMPLETELY DEFLATES THEM, or forgets to unscrew the presta head and just lays into the pump with all he's got to no avail. I've personally explained the mechanics of the presta valve to him three or four times, and once he started ranting about how stupid he was in a really serious, almost scary manner. Was ridiculous.

these are the people who need those solid rubber tires

jordanpattern wrote:
BRING ME THE BINDERS OF WOMEN!

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 14:50
wickedwagon
wickedwagon's picture

double bubble

jordanpattern wrote:
BRING ME THE BINDERS OF WOMEN!

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 14:51
crabbi
crabbi's picture

When I was working at Copeland Sports (the bike shop was almost like it's own shop that happened to be in a sports store, this was the same with every department and why the store was successful until they were bought and ran by this corporation), I basically had the best job ever. The 4 others that were in my department were my great friends. We got commission on sales AND repairs, AND we got $ per bike built even while on the clock. So many lulz were had at that place. If we weren't selling or working on bikes, we were riding them around or causing mayhem. In the back hallway of the work area we would set up old cardboard boxes and have "tomahawk" and "ninjastar" (ds crank arm with a single ring and chainrings, respectively) throwing contests. We made water and fire guns out of yakima rack tubes + air compressor and also used it as a cannon quite regulary in department wars. We built a bmx front-end out of spare parts to just hang-five around the store. We took chairs from the camping dept and took naps, and did pretty much whatever we wanted. The management left us alone for the most part because our numbers were killing it. I worked there for two years and we constantly would blow out prior year's sales.
Well, one day I was called into the security office and accused of stealing. I NEVER so much as took a stick of gum without paying for it. There was a few times I borrowed a jacked during lunch because it was cold and once I left without paying for a chain, but I paid for it when I came in the next day. But these dudes were accusing me of stealing FUCKING FIFTEEN FULL-SQUISH ROCKY MOUNTAIN BIKES. Fifteen! WTF? How the hell would I get out of that place with cameras everywhere? And fit 1, let alone 15 bikes into my toyota corolla? I told him to show me the proof/video that I stole these bikes. When he said he wasn't allowed to show evidence, he handed me a "repayment plan" paperwork and told me they were willing to settle for the amount of $300. Yeah, I just stole, at the very minimum, $20k worth of bikes and all the company wants in compensation is $300? I told the theft dude to fuck off and told my store manager I quit. By the end of the day, the other 4 people in the shop all quit. Fuck that place. They went out of business a few months later.

Sneaky Viking wrote:
if you're here, you probably fucked up somewhere along the line.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 15:50
bigmatt

Some of these recent posts remind me of some more of my own. The first one is the amount of fun and useless stuff we use to do at the shop. Our owner was pretty much never around so we kind of did what ever we wanted to. In the middle of winter in Michigan there is pretty much nothing to do so we improvised little games to keep us entertained. One of those games was called "Coming in Hot". We were a recumbent dealer so the game involved one of the recumbent trikes and ridding it into the repair area around all three stands and ridding out between the wall and the counter. It was called coming in hot because you were not supposed to use the brakes at all and try to do it as fast as you could. We had some great two wheel turns and a few minor crashes into the repair benches or repair stands.

The other thing I am reminded of is or most pain in the ass customer, lets call him Don. He was originally riding an older electric bike that the electric assist didn't work anymore. So he would ride around town through snow on a 50lb+ bike with no assist. He would often come in for flat tires as he was a good 250lbs+ and had trouble walking normally so he had another 30-40lbs of crutches and other assorted crap on the back of the bike at all times. One time we eventually told him this is the last time we will ever work on this bike. The shifter and none of the brakes worked anymore because they were so completely rusted out the only way to fix them was a new bike. He eventually bought a new Giant Electric bike from us (70lb + unloaded), and put himself and his brother on the original sales documents because he was worried if he died would his brother still be able to warranty parts on it. He would often come in before he bought it asking the same warranty questions about the possible upcoming purchase. He ended up buying it and had rear wheel flat problems because of the 300+ lbs of himself and the other crap on the rear wheel. I think all but one flat was a pinch flat. He also had some shifting problems on it every other day it seem, and nothing was wrong most of the time. One of the times something was wrong I said he would have to leave it for me to fix the shifting problem. The cable wasn't moving freely through the housing the way it should. He had a fit as it is his only means of transportation. I told him to look around and see how many other people were working here (most of the summer it was only myself open to close 7 days a week). He did leave it and I found out the next day that he got ahold of the owners cell phone and called him to complain. The owner I am happy to say backed me 100%. It ended up being a dual problem of frayed cable and the Nexus shifting parts on the hub binding. It took myself and the owner a few hours of messing with it to eventually figure out the problem. Don's first words after I called and told him it was ready to be picked up was, "that is covered under warranty right". My response was of course not as it was only a $10-15 charge for it.

The worst part of Don is actually talking with him. Here is a recap of a normal conversation I had with him during one of the tire flat fixes:

Don: "Um, um, um, I, um, um , um, want to, uh, um, uh use my other bike un, um for winter riding"
me: "Okay"
Don: "What, um, uh, should I, um, uh, um,uh do for storing it, uh, um, uh, um for the winter"
me: "take it inside"
Don: "um, uh, I, uh, um, wasn't sure, um, uh, if I had to, um, uh do anything different"
me: "Nope"

I think you get the idea of a conversation with him. It should only take 10 seconds to tell me what you want, but it would take him a minute or two. The other thing that always bothered me about him is he would pay with a check and would round up to the next dollar value because it was easier to balance his check book that way. He also knew he would be paying with a check and should know how much it costs since it is the same everytime. He never once would make out his check in advance. He would grab the chair we had on the floor, and put it in front of the register, and then start to write out everything and explain (every fucking time!) how it was easier to make the check out for an even dollar amount ($11.77 was a normal flat charge and he would do $12 for instance). Because of him I often would end up with customers stacked up because his flat repair would take 30 minutes + because of him and his checks. I actually rang him up once and while waiting for the actual check repaired a flat on another bike.

When I worked with multiple people we would take turns dealing with him since it always sucked. This last year I got to help him almost every time by myself, good times!

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 18:40
RJ
RJ's picture

Well, hindsight being what it is I'm sure you've seen the err of your ways.

1. Coming in hot
2. Don
3. ???
4. Profit

I'm pretty sure every shop has at least one Don.

truckdoug wrote:
go fuck yourself, fun hating motherfucker

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 19:55
VT regularbike
VT regularbike's picture

coming in hot sounds fun as shit.

Miguel wrote:
i mean as long as we're spending money, lets just set the wallet on fire ok

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 20:02
radicole
radicole's picture

rabbi wrote:
Rabbi's crazy story

dude. that's absolutely insane. Good of your friends to back you up.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 23:01
turpencat
turpencat's picture

sounds like Don just has some problems.

johnnyraja wrote:
If you've never done it then yes, it's very surprising.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 23:24
blickblocks
blickblocks's picture

VT tallbike wrote:
coming in hot sounds fun as shit.

Wed, 12/15/2010 - 23:27
Petr5
Petr5's picture

blickblocks wrote:
VT tallbike wrote:
coming in hot sounds fun as shit.

That's so sexual.

Sneaky Viking wrote:
"Your bike sucks and we have a team of biased experts to pseudo-scientifically test that hypothesis, all in blue shirts."

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 00:20
JUGE FREDD
JUGE FREDD's picture

Petr5 wrote:
blickblocks wrote:
VT tallbike wrote:
coming in hot sounds fun as shit.

That's so sexual.

See 0:48 and 1:08 for my appraisal

It's a struggle, but you cut out his tongue, and his last words are "atmo atmo Atmo ATMO ATMOOOOOGORIHGGHRSHGGRLMGGMMGMgrrglegurglegrr....."
– akasnowmaaan

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 04:47
TimArchyLime
TimArchyLime's picture

Josh probably has some good stories. I never seem to be around when the good stuff happens. Probably because i hate fun. I did meet a lady who claims she's the spawn of a wolf and a bear. And another woman who wanted a saddle that would not hurt her vagina bone.

Snarky Varking wrote:
Tarckbike- Where mile 11 means you're on a long ride.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 08:26
crabbi
crabbi's picture

TC: I really want to build another one of those front wheel contraptions for just fucking around outside.

Sneaky Viking wrote:
if you're here, you probably fucked up somewhere along the line.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 09:29
timberland boots
timberland boots's picture

turpencat wrote:
sounds like Don just has some problems.

Yeah. I get a lot of those dudes at my real job and I just feel bad for them. They're usually pretty lonely and fucked up and having a hard time of everything.

Anal Beads Al-Qaeda Ball Gag NAMBLA

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 11:28
deadforkinglast
deadforkinglast's picture

Used to see dudes like that all the time at the coop. You feel sorry at first, but repeat offenders get really tiresome. There was one crazy middle-aged dude in Santa Cruz who always smelled terrible and would always special order like $7 worth of stuff and then keep badgering us every day about whether we had gotten it in yet, no matter how many times we would tell him that we sending out the order on the nth of x-tober and not any sooner than that. Then he would start talking about his adventures in Nisene Marks state park that seemed to mostly consist of riding his mountain bike on the road and nothing ever happening. Then he would typically start talking about tires and how his Specialized tires were super awesome because of the siping on the tread, then he would explain what siping was. Every fucking day, usually for about a week at a time. He would usually be outside the door at 10:30, even though we opened at 11. We just stopped asking him what he wanted until 11:00 on the dot.

I eventually took on the task of steering him out of the coop and having the siping conversation outside, where his smell was easier to deal with and he didn't scare away customers. I usually just went around the back of the shop, smoked a fatty spliff and then came back and ate my lunch while he rambled on and on and on and on and on. It was much easier to be interested in his aimless rambling while SAF.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 13:10
pixieshatintruck
pixieshatintruck's picture

i'm perty sure that the most annoying/insane bike shop customer is jesus
and he is coming back to test bike shop employees
to see if you are worthy to get into heaven
better treat them nice

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 13:41
deadforkinglast
deadforkinglast's picture

Totally. But if Jesus walked in that door and wanted to talk about siping for an hour, I would get SAF and eat a burrito first.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 13:50
crabbi
crabbi's picture

deadforkinglast wrote:
Totally. But if Jesus walked in that door and wanted to talk about siping for an hour, I would get SAF and eat a burrito first.

pretty sigg worthy, atmo

Sneaky Viking wrote:
if you're here, you probably fucked up somewhere along the line.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 14:26
turpencat
turpencat's picture

Siping is a process of cutting thin slits across a rubber surface to improve traction in wet or icy conditions.

Siping was invented and patented in 1923 by John F. Sipe [1][2] The story told on various websites is that, in the 1920s, Sipe worked in a slaughterhouse and grew tired of slipping on the wet floors. He found that cutting slits in the tread on the bottoms of his shoes provided better traction than the uncut tread.

The process was not applied to vehicle tires on a large scale until the 1950s, when superior tread compounds were developed that could stand up to the siping process. On roads covered with snow, ice, mud, and water, sipes usually increase traction. A US patent to Goodyear claimed sipes improve tire traction as well, and tend to close completely in the tire "footprint" on the road. A 1978 study by the US National Safety Council found siping improved stopping distances by 22 percent, breakaway traction by 65 percent, and rolling traction by 28 percent on glare ice.

Tire tread block shapes, groove configurations, and sipes affect tire noise pattern and traction characteristics. Typically, wide, straight grooves have a low noise level and good water removal. More lateral grooves usually increase traction. Sipes are small grooves that are cut across larger tread elements. Up to a point, more sipes give more traction in snow or mud.

As is often the case, there are compromises. Winter tires, and "mud and snow" tires, may have thousands of sipes and give good traction. But, they may feel "squirmy" on a warm, dry road. Treadless racing "slicks" on dry roads give maximum traction. These have no sipes, no grooves, and no tread blocks. They also have very poor traction however on even slightly wet surfaces. Tire manufacturers use different tread rubber compounds and tread designs for different tires' usages.

Large sipes are usually built into the tread during manufacturing. Sipes may also be cut into the tread at a later date, called "microsiping". Bandag developed a machine for microsiping which places a curved knife blade at a slight angle on a rotating drum. The drum is placed so when it is pressed against the tread the tire is pressed into an exaggerated hollow, as if driving down a rail. The drum is lubricated and rotated and the knife makes a series of diagonal cuts across the tread. For improved traction, the tire may be siped twice, leaving diamond-shaped blocks. A significant problem with field siping is that the tread picks up rocks, glass, and other hard road debris in use, and even with thorough cleaning the knife service life is often poor.

Microsiping can dramatically improve tire traction in rain and snow. However, microsiped tires may also have increased road noise and tire wear when operated on dry surfaces. ConsumerReports.org recommends against adding more than "the sipes that your tires come with" because of longevity and dry performance. [3] Some companies such as Les Schwab claim that microsiped tires reduce tire friction heat and tire wear and extends the life of the tire. [4]

In Massachusetts in the 1970s, it was legal to operate a school bus with bald tires, provided they were double microsiped.

Both Bridgestone and Michelin sell snow tires that are siped at the factory, while Saf-Tee Siping and Grooving sells machines that can sipe most standard vehicle tires. Siping can also be done by hand. Be aware that siping the tires can void the manufacturer's warranty.
/heath

johnnyraja wrote:
If you've never done it then yes, it's very surprising.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 14:33
Elderbear
Elderbear's picture

curiousincident wrote:
woah. honestly sounds like he might've been on to something there. i mean, i accidently let out 5-10 psi regularly enough but total deflation? that takes several seconds of doing it completely wrong.

Yep. A normal person, even one who doesn't know what they're doing, will stop after a second of "pffft", but this guy just lays into it like he's just going to will his tube into inflating. It's alarming at first, then I look and see it's him and get ready to explain the presta valve process again.

johnnyraja wrote:
This is the most pointless conversation ever had on a forum entirely devoted to pointless conversation.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 17:10
Elderbear
Elderbear's picture

stiffytruck wrote:
i'm perty sure that the most annoying/insane bike shop customer is jesus
and he is coming back to test bike shop employees
to see if you are worthy to get into heaven
better treat them nice

Goddammit, I try.

johnnyraja wrote:
This is the most pointless conversation ever had on a forum entirely devoted to pointless conversation.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 17:12
timberland boots
timberland boots's picture

turpencat wrote:
Siping is a process of cutting thin slits across...

Read the entire thing, found it enlightening

Anal Beads Al-Qaeda Ball Gag NAMBLA

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 18:10
jamey
jamey's picture

Rich wrote:
turpencat wrote:
Siping is a process of cutting thin slits across...

Read the entire thing, found it enlightening

totally, thanks wikiheath.

truckdoug "never turn down free beer, dont stick your dick where you wouldnt put your face, and always ride shimano"

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 18:13
biek

wikiheaths.org

pappaheugwang wrote:
u mad bro?

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 18:18
deadforkinglast
deadforkinglast's picture

Elderbear wrote:
curiousincident wrote:
woah. honestly sounds like he might've been on to something there. i mean, i accidently let out 5-10 psi regularly enough but total deflation? that takes several seconds of doing it completely wrong.

Yep. A normal person, even one who doesn't know what they're doing, will stop after a second of "pffft", but this guy just lays into it like he's just going to will his tube into inflating. It's alarming at first, then I look and see it's him and get ready to explain the presta valve process again.

The pattern that I've noticed is that people who decide in advance that they cannot use a pump are typically correct. Most (not all) stupid people are stupid by choice, even if they don't know it. I think it's easier for them to declare themselves stupid in advance of trying, which usually gets someone else to do it for them.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 18:43
yung jeezy
yung jeezy's picture

"hey guys, do you have a pump i can use?"
(wheels walmart special into the shop towards the mechanic area, both tires are clearly flat and the bike is more rusty than a sunken ship)
"uhh, yeah bud. right as you walk in the door there is a pump underneath the 3 ft. wide sign that says 'free air'"
"oh, thats what that sign said"
every. damn. day.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 19:38
Rusty Piton
Rusty Piton's picture

I've walked up to shops to discover that their free air only works for shrader or only went up to like 60psi so I've asked to use a floor pump. But I usually carry a road morph so it's mostly a non issue, but it has happened.

emor wrote:
Bicycle commuting is the worst way to get anywhere except for all the other ways.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 19:46
circuithero
circuithero's picture

"i need a bike for my 10 year old son that will last him until college"

everyday.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 19:57
radicole
radicole's picture

circuithero wrote:
"i need a bike for my 10 year old son that will last him until college"

everyday.

my favorite:

"I need a bike that I can commute on, and like, do long rides."

"okay...so we're looki---"

"Oh, also, i like to go off road and stuff."

"have you thought about a price range?"

"like...$300?"

facepalm inside.

Thu, 12/16/2010 - 21:30

Pages